[ Mental Destruction ]

Mental, adj. Of or relating to the mind; specifically : of or relating to the total emotional and intellectual response of an individual to external reality b : of or relating to intellectual as contrasted with emotional activity

Destruction, n. The condition of having been destroyed.
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Mental... Destruction. The act of destroying one's mentality.
Difficult and extremely satisfying, does not require physical violence.

Perhaps the easiest way to destroy ones mind is through the use of frustration. Making someone frustrated is a powerful tool. The side effects are strangling hazards, so use with caution.

Today I shall teach you how to make a newly recruited cash-register assistant cry; just what you need with the new holidays coming in. Use these techniques on me; and you die. Enjoy the lesson...

Lots. You need to fill an entire trolley with the following.

• Clothes, particularly womens underwear; they have lots of annoying types of hangers, and take forever to unhook.
• Big stuff; Bikes, TVs, Barbequeues.. get two of these.
• Small foods, many varieties; get the small packets, but lots of different types so the person has to scan each one separetely.
• Icky stuff; Find that leaking bottle of conditioner... break one if you have to.
• Items with no barcodes; farout these take ages.
• Fruit; singular peices. Preferably unwrapped.
• Unfrozen frozen foods; or dripping meat.
  

Now that you have your items.. it's time for the torment.
With all your items in one big trolley, look for the longest line; and line up. This allows for the assistant to see you long before serving you.

Remember to be patient. Insanity is measured by how long you are willing to wait...

Once you are told the price of the combined items, pay by credit. Of course, you don't have a real credit card... just your library card from a different state. Oh wait, you just realised that you now want to buy something from the back of the store.. "Wait here please!" And run to get your item. Come back in a few minutes with a second trolley of items. Now, you can't figure out why the library card isn't scanning properly... or pay by cash, with monopoly money. Why isn't it legal tender? Press the [Sign in/Sign out] and [Enter] button while the clerk is typing stuff.

Pay for all the items with a cheque after much hassle. After everything is packed, inform the clerk that you want to pay for your laybys. Of course, you have 500 receipts, with only 2 of them laybys. Pass them to the clerk anyway.

Once that is done, go back to the courtesy desk and refund all items. Repeat.


Mmmmmmm...............................

-Mrah'Sponagi